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Confucius Court

John Lethlean and Reviewer

<em>Confucius Court.</em>
Confucius Court.Supplied

Chinese

Score: 13/20

Be honest with yourself.

When was the last time you had a meal that started with potato and ended with it, too? Unless you've been on some unique spud diet, or down celebrating harvest with the potato growers of Korumburra, I suspect the answer is "never". It was a first for me.

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But here we were at Confucius Court, a new restaurant in Glenferrie Road where Panda sat for decades, winding up a rather interesting dinner with a potato dessert. Low carb it ain't. But more of that later.

Confucius opened a few months ago, proudly branding itself as a "Shandong Chinese Restaurant". I have to admit not knowing Shandong was a province of China; I'd not heard of Shandong cuisine before, either. This is where the restaurant's menu comes to the rescue. Sort of.

It explains that Confucius was born in Shan Dong. It also says Shandong cuisine "can be traced back to the Spring and Autumn period", whatever that may mean.

I soon found myself looking forward to condiments such as "sauce paste, fistulous onion and garlic", which I was led to believe are "freely used".

"Famous dishes," said this illustrated preamble, "are braised abalone with shells, fried sea cucumber with fistulous onion and fragrant calamus in milk soup." Mmmmm, calamus.

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Sadly, none of these three dishes is on the actual menu, or list of dishes, at Confucius Court, which led to a little confusion of my own. In fact, several of the dishes we subsequently ate are not on the menu either. Well, not the one we saw.

Only by engaging our enthusiastic maitre d' did we arrive at an order that included things not listed on the English menu. Right down to staples that presumably appear on a different - Chinese - version.

Confucius is selling itself, and us, a little short, I reckon.

The restaurant is carpeted and audibly draped with never-ending Richard Clayderman-style piano, its generously spaced tables set with regal carved chairs and decorative plates. The place has a dignified formality although things are not too leaden, with a variety of silk fabrics and rich paint hues.

With only a few diners on a Thursday night, we found the friendly staff under-employed and, therefore, just a little too eager to help at times. However.

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The restaurant has a rather perky little wine list at very fair prices, although I found the attempted substitution of a Pirie South pinot for the Pirie Estate I ordered just a little disconcerting.

So, to the food. The host talked us into a selection of entrees that included two little complimentary shredded "salads": one was of carrot and quite sweet; the other was of potato that had been steamed, apparently, losing all its starchiness (you might have confused it with bamboo shoot). It was tossed with more sugar, but also, perhaps, sesame oil and definitely fresh chilli. It was refreshing, savoury and very good.

Our selection included four excellent steamed fish dumplings ($6) served with black vinegar; oily little battered and fried eggplant fritters, apparently stuffed with minced pork (although it was a subtle stuffing, two for $5) and two fabulous smoked pork pancakes ($4.50 each) that were basically Peking duck without the quack.

Then we ordered, or should I say, negotiated, main courses. Our waiter had a few views about what we should have, a refreshing assertiveness so many Chinese restaurants could take a lead from. For example, he strongly insisted we drop "Sweet and sour pork Shandong style" for an unlisted chicken version ($18).

There's a lot of time going into carrot carving out back of Confucius Court, and the chicken arrived with an intricately whittled orange "pigeon" (elsewhere we saw roses, butterflies and grasshoppers). But the chicken itself - lightly floured and seasoned marinated nuggets, fried - came with a light, honey-based sauce with plenty of chopped garlic and spring onion and was indeed rather good, if unremarkable.

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And he was happy with our choice of "stir fired tender lamb with aniseed and ziran sauce", although I still have no idea what ziran sauce is. The lamb had been tenderised and wok-fried with cornflour - getting slippery in the process - with carrots, mushrooms, cucumber and heaps of fresh coriander stalks ($20). What was interesting was the spicing: turmeric, coriander, chilli powder . . . in flavour if nothing else, it was very much like a Middle Eastern dish. Excellent.

Another item he insisted on (instead of rice) was the light, white, pan-fried and slightly risen bread called spring onion pancake (large, $7), something I've never seen before. It is wonderful, so much better than steamed bread (we had that, too) but why on earth are these staples not on the menu?

And the spuds? Cut like short chips, the potato had been steamed (I'm guessing) and cooked with toffee, coming to the table in a sticky stack ($7). You grab one, dip it in water - which instantly solidifies the toffee, giving your chip a crisp, sweet shell - and eat it with coconut ice cream. A bit of fun, but more novelty than anything else.

Which is about what I'd say of the restaurant itself; for culinary anthropologists happy to persist and eat off-piste, it's definitely worth a visit.

It may well be the best Shandong food in Melbourne. Some, however, may feel more constrained, less adventurous, and miss the quirkiness of the place.

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In which case, let's hope the waiter keeps recommending the spuds.

Score: 19: Unacceptable. 10-11: Just OK, some shortcomings. 12: Fair. 13:Getting there. 14: Recommended. 15: Good. 16: Really good. 17: Truly excellent. 18: Outstanding. 19-20: Approaching perfection, Victoria's best.

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