Easey's burgers

48 Easey Street, Collingwood, Victoria

An 'Easey's Burger' and a blue heaven doughnut at Easey's in Collingwood.
An 'Easey's Burger', Melbourne Bitter tinny and a blue heaven doughnut. Photo: Jesse Marlow

Dani Valent

Easey's has altitude but it doesn't boast postcard views. Close by, it's weedy empty blocks, dour commission flats and grey grids of streets. There is a slice of city skyline but Melbourne isn't showing her best side: she's more down-at-heel than Blue Steel.

None of that matters, though, because you're taking in the sights from a graffiti-covered train carriage plonked five storeys high. Anyway, a burger as big as your head is bound to take up most of your attention.

Collingwood's craziest restaurant is the brainchild of burger obsessive Jimmy Hurlston (@jimmysburgers on Instagram) and curator Jeremy Gaschk and it's about to head into its first summer.

Diners at Easey's in Collingwood.
Easey's overlooks Collingwood's grungy backstreets. Photo: Pat Scala

I don't know why sitting on a rooftop in a Texta-tagged train carriage is so thrilling but it absolutely is. Easey's is a friendly celebration of naughtiness and care-factor-zero: hip-hop, graffiti and stunningly unhealthy food are the heroes.

The burgers are feats of endurance rather than square meals. It's objectively not a good idea to put a double-fried beer-battered dim sim in a burger but that doesn't stop it happening here.

It's clearly unnecessary to whack a double-fried potato cake into the same burger, the 'Melbourne Madness', which also includes two beef patties, triple cheese and a bunch of sauces you may try to identify as they trickle down your arms. Oh and bacon, obviously.

Frosties fried chicken and a deep-fried Pop Tart at Easey's.
Breakfast of champions: Frosties fried chicken and a deep-fried pop tart. Photo: Pat Scala

Diners are also encouraged to spec their own burgers: if you want five dimmies and six patties in your burger, they'll build it. Unhinging your jaw to eat it is your own problem.

The vegetarian "Your Mate" comes with a zucchini and potato roesti that's crisp on the outside and juicy – but not drippy – within. It's good but it feels wrong to eat vegetables here so you may want to chase it with hard liquor, or maybe a quadruple side of bacon.

Beyond burgers, there are desserts such as pop tarts (deep-fried, of course), which also pop up for breakfast, alongside chicken battered in Frosties flakes. Basically, if you feel more sprightly walking out than walking in then you really weren't trying.

The 'Melbourne Madness' burger.
The 'Melbourne Madness' burger. Photo: Pat Scala

It isn't all about the train ride. There's a rooftop deck, second floor function zone and, downstairs, a diner with tiny TVs glued to gridiron. Early in the evening, families flock and there's a bent-out-of-shape Macca's birthday party vibe. Later, it's bar hoppers and burger babes. Book online for a train seat and that gorgeously grungy view.

Rating: Three and a half stars (out of five)

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48 Easey Street, Collingwood, Victoria

  • Cuisine - American (US)
  • Prices - Breakfast $6-$9; burgers $8-$23; desserts $2.50-$4
  • Features - Accepts bookings, Licensed, Outdoor seating, Views
  • Owners - Jimmy Hurlston and Jeremy Gaschk
  • Cards accepted - Mastercard, Visa, EFTPOS
  • Opening Hours - Sun-Thu 9am-10pm; Fri-Sat 9am-11pm
  • Author - Dani Valent
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4 comments so far

  • Travelled from the outer South-East, but was made to feel right at home at Easey's. Incredible food and surroundings. Booked online (a must) and was helped by geniune, easy going staff. Can't wait to return.

    Commenter
    Damo
    Location
    Melbourne
    Date and time
    November 26, 2015, 4:55PM
  • I was looking forward to catching up with friends and the idea of eating burgers in a train carriage located on top of a building.. Burgers were really small.. We ordered a large bowl of chips that came out in a small bowl for 4 people to share.. Disappointing!! A lot of the extras that you can choose in your burger i.e. dim sims and potato cakes are deep fried and battered and deep fried again.. No thanks.. It is very noisy as the area is really small. Staff are very friendly. Great for the experience..

    Commenter
    Poulos
    Location
    Date and time
    November 26, 2015, 7:50PM
  • Hey Damo, Glad you had a good experience. Online booking is definitely the way to go at Easey's. Dani

    Commenter
    Dani Valent
    Location
    Melbourne
    Date and time
    November 27, 2015, 11:26AM
  • Hi Poulos, Yes, it's not a big area and the whole deep-fried angle isn't for everyone - or not for every day anyway! I thought the Melbourne Madness was plenty big enough though. I agree the staff are friendly and it's a cool experience. Thanks for commenting!

    Commenter
    Dani Valent
    Location
    Melbourne
    Date and time
    November 27, 2015, 2:31PM

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