Monkey King

A friend of mine has a theory that there's always The Good Bar at the Airport, which despite better furniture and a trend-friendly menu is not somewhere you'd ever visit unless in transit. Sometimes it's impossible to overcome a bad location, even with the best intentions.

This also applies to any bar in a shopping centre, or a train station, of which Monkey King is both. The large venue is wedged between the back entrance of Melbourne Central station and a long escalator to the food court. Not a great start, but inside it's more appealing than you might expect.

The theme is exuberantly "pan Asian", which means a lot of mood lighting, coloured paper umbrellas on the ceiling, and a Balinese temple-ish bar daubed in plastic vines and fairy lights.

On Friday night, the place is full of rosy-cheeked students and office drones winding down from the week as a baseball-capped DJ spins techno remixes of pop ear-worms (Shake It Off, I Was Made For Loving You).

It's another spoke in the empire of David Zhou​, who owns South Yarra stalwart David's, cocktail bar Zhou Zhou and the Oriental Teahouse chain. Until last year this was a branch of the Teahouse, and the legacy remains as many of the pun-heavy cocktails (Me Love Oolong Time!) are made using house-infused tea syrups.

They are teeth-coatingly sweet, texta-coloured creations, including the Berry Tea Margarita ($19) which is light years away from the original recipe and encrusted with lurid purple Wizz Fizz sherbet. The Rose Tea Tom Collins ($12) is better, house gin poured over cucumber slices with lychee liqueur, rosewater and a galaxy of petal pieces.

The drinks list is a beast, but there are a few gems to be discovered, including a wave of Japanese craft beers from Hitachino Nest and nips of Hibiki 17-year-old whisky.

Food sticks to the Asian theme, with many snacks available "from the dim sum trolley". I am saddened to realise there isn't an actual dim sum trolley being wheeled around the venue, which would be a hoot – it's a standard a la carte list of pricey dumplings, spring rolls and stir-fries of tenuous authenticity. You'll find better eats at most joints in Chinatown.

But the King isn't necessarily going for greatness. It's functional, populist fun, designed for city hordes to fly in, and fly out. It's The Good Bar at the Shopping Centre.

THE LOWDOWN
Drink this Rose Tea Tom Collins, $12.
Eat this Wagyu beef dumplings with tea-infused sauce, $9.80.
Say this "The next train leaves in eight minutes. Shots?"
Know this There's a different deal on every night, with two-for-one cocktails and snack specials.