Pass me the noise-cancelling headphones, waiter

COMMENT

With every new restaurant opening and menu to sample it also seems there's another new hearing test. I'm all up for a lively time at the table and a restaurant's soundtrack is integral to the mood and memory of a night out, however why do so many restaurateurs want to make my ears bleed?

I find there is little consideration from new venues to accord comfortable acoustics. Perhaps restaurant owners are under the folly they are regaling customers with their impeccable music taste. And why do so many restaurants insist on broadcasting their music so poorly – letting it bounce discordantly around non-insulated surfaces?

My preferred dining companion has sensitive hearing so I like to do a sly reconnaissance mission before I take them somewhere new. I remember only too well the time we fronted up to our reservation at one restaurant that was a 15-minute cab ride away, only to turn on our heels due to the noise. Ester in Chippendale saved us that night.

Places that merge drinking and eating with a leaning towards the bar have more leeway with music. Why else would I order dumplings from the warm hosts at Melbourne's Union Electric if they didn't collect them for me from New Kum Den BBQ next door while House of Pain hammers in the background?

I must acknowledge the eardrum-friendly venues too. Restaurant Hubert on a Friday lunchtime, for example, is a favourite retreat from the Sydney CBD's incessant construction noise. There are also restaurants where I barely notice the music such is my absorption in their ragu or rigorous floor service. (St Kilda's Cafe Di Stasio case in point.)

Many venues resort to the safety of Spotify compilations or hospitality music providers, however some restaurants take particular pride in their music selection and even dabble in music events through the year. I like it when a restaurant has its own sense of personality and the strength of music selection makes me wish I could go to a Sunday barbecue in the owner's backyard.

What is the perfect music to eat to, then? It's difficult to give a definitive answer. I love '90s hip-hop but hip-hop on repeat is not the calmest accompaniment to dinner. I also love the drama of flamenco singer Diego El Cigala but he could bring on a panic attack after a long day.

Late-night jazz seems apt but that might make someone else grind their teeth while they wait for their wine. The real point is, though, how is it being shared? Is it warmly enveloping or competitive? Does it carry conversation or mar it? Is the music that keeps your chefs' energy primed for the long haul the same music your diners will respond to?

Restaurateurs: please think before you press play.

Melissa Pearce is a freelance writer.